The Worst Movie Ever Made

Just because a movie is on free On Demand, does not mean you should watch it.

Currently playing, in front of me, is the most horrendous movie I have ever had the misfortune of watching: Zombie Nation.

I'm going to give it all away because there is no reason to watch it, so I don't think spoilers will matter.

The main character is a German guy named Siegler or something like that. Although he has mannerisms that resemble Ahrnold and a similar accent, his character claims to be from Alabama. He is a member of the LAPD, except that he only drives a burgandy car with a gumball light on it. Did I also mention that he is a serial killer?

Yes, our German cop from Alabama is a serial killer. He pulls over women in his nondescript cop car, then handcuffs them and takes them to a warehouse, where he ties them up, gives them a physical exam (literally too...he has a doctors flashlight and looks down their noses and their ears), then injects them with something that kills them.

This in and of itself does not make for a bad movie. But, when you consider that his partner cop stays outside the warehouse while this goes on and fails to ask the guy what is in the huge duffell bag that the evil German/Alabamaian cop (EGAC) puts in his trunk. We see the EGAC kill three women.

At the station house, which is actually the same warehouse where the guy kills his victims at but redressed to have cubicles, the captain doesn't want to hear anything about his subordinate killing anyone, so the guy can ostensibly continue.

That is, until he kills the hot Russian chick for "jaywalking." You see, she was prepared. She went to a voodoo priestess and had a spell put on her to protect her from death. So when she gets injected and dumped off of his boat (cops make good money in LA apparently) she comes back to life. Of course, for no real reason, so do the other four women he killed who have been nowhere near a voodoo priestess.

Bear in mind that it took one hour of an hour and 24 minute movie to get to this.

The Zombie makeup would make Tom Savini jealous. They put eye black around the women's eyes. Two girls get up first, find a guy in a car who, for some reason, lets them into the car after telling his secretary to "dump all his pesos." He has second thoughts when the zombie offers to kiss him and them bites his tounge off.

The second group finds a redneck who whips out his jimmy (apparently he doesn't see many people) and one of them rips it off and eats it.

They converge on the voodoo house and they tell them that the have to kill the guy.

They go kill the guy.

Then they get hired on as police officers.

The movie ends.

Absolutely, bar none the single worse movie ever put on film. How this made On Demand I have no idea.