[Lucha] ... Eh.

The show after Triplemania XV ... time to trudge forward.

El Guapito is mega. I entertain the notion that he's really a twelve year old that AAA is corrupting with liquor & big booty bitches. However, a close-up on his face reveals more wrinkles than Betty White's bacon strips.

Fantasy Book Fandango
Joe Lider
vs.
Colt Cabana

.... Wait. Joe Lider and Crazy Boy (wik Extreme Tiger), fresh off the vic over Zumbido & Scorpio Jr. (also wik Alan Stone), get fuckin' IXNAYED by Sabu & Ron "The Truth" Killings (currently slumming it with Adam Jones in TNA). Did not see that coming, and I am very pleased.

Alfa catches Fabi Apache coming out of the free clinic, and hits on her ... DRAMA!!! If this angle doesn't lead to Fabi declaring her intentions to "only be friends" with Alfa, then Alfa beats her fucking whoring ass, I'll be disappointed.

Alberjie, El Elegido & Super Porky d. Zumbido, Scorpio Jr. & Alan Stone
Don't understand why Zumbido, Scorpio Jr. and Alan Stone had to pull double duty, or why they pissed off to give up a win to Alberjie, Elegido and Porkito. And, in the middle of the match, damn feed knocks out! It must be the channel, 'cause Comedy Central is still showing "My Boss' Daughter" ... oh, Ashton Kutcher, to be you for just an hour ... that'd be plenty of time for suicide. And it's back, in time to catch Guapito whipping arse on Alberije. Even with that 15 minute outage, I don't feel like I missed a thing, except maybe five "learn English as a second language" utility commercials. Super Porky is just past saltar el tiburón.

Sabu speaks! "Mexican Powers ... you think you know hardcore? I'm the King of Hardcore!" I thought dude had injured his vocal cords in a barbed wire match in Japan, taping them up during the match & finishing before heading to the hospital, only to have the operation be unsuccessful, and so he was henceforth rendered mute. Well, that's what I heard, anyway.

An ad for Ana Gabriel's new CD comes on, and, my Spanish is pretty rusty at times, but I honestly think the translation of the lyrics to "En La Oscuridad" is just her telling me that she wants to do butt-naked split legged moonsaults on my dick. That's a pretty racy commercial, there.

Interview with Kenzo Suzuki: Kenzo is speaking Japanese(!), the interviewer is translating in Spanish(!!), and I'm getting the kind of headache that I used to get when I first started watching untranslated lucha.

Abismo Negro, Kenzo Sukuky (sic) & Mesias d. Alberije, Charly Manson & La Parka
Why the fuck is Alberije and his midget back on my TV? They rock the swank Vader/ Yoda entrance costumes, but that has some diminishing returns on their suckiness. Sweet ... a heavy-duty booty fan jumps on La Parka on his way to the ring (like a standing humping position), and he carries her(!) like this to the ring. This episode of Lucha Libre has seriously slipped into our reality from the fucking Twilight Zone, ya'll. Headhunter I is apparently on a mission to rape the shit out of mini-Alberije, 'cause the minute he gets bodyslammed mid-match by Mesias (after some choice interference), Headhunter sprints out and goes for the big splash ... but Alberije intervenes and takes one for the team. Suzuki pins Parka after some obfuscation.

Ron Killings, Sabu & X-Pac d. Chessman, Cibernetico & Zorro
That's it, I'm convinced ... God hates lucha libre. Ron Killings has so much potential, tapped only during his sting as NWA/TNA champion; the quicker he gets back to calling us all a buncha "white bread cracker asses," the happier we should all be for it. I wouldn't cry about a good X-Pac/ Juventud AAA match, y'know? Oh my god, it's fucking Chessman!! Fresh off his plunge o' doom from the cage last week, here dude its again, and apparently not paralyzed ... good for him. Watching Sabu vs. Zorro is like watching good Sabu vs. bad Sabu. You know, this was a surprisingly good match, considering the six talents in the ring. Even Alicia Webb got some swank interference in, choking Zorro in the corner with Old Glory. Nutkick by an interfering Mesias to Cibernetico turns the tide of this one. Sabu tries to put Zorro through a table (x3), but tables, like the Mexican spirit, don't break (x3) in Tijuana, bitches.

I'm noticing, over the past several shows, a disturbing trend toward run-ins in the mains; I hope we aren't running up into 2nd year NWO territory here.