I called Lander's Human Resources to see if they filled the Counseling position. "A tentative offer has been made to a candidate." That candidate was not me. So I'm still at Beckman for a little while longer.
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
[Music] Dilated Peoples - "20|20"
This was a disappointing release, for me. It felt like, they put out a commercially viable (although poorly produced) album with "Neighborhood Watch," but then screwed it up by sandbagging it on this one.
Rakaa, one of my favorite of the newer school, takes Dilated critics to task and drops the line "People says we're just battle raps & ganga." And then the album devotes itself almost entirely to just those very things. From the numerous interruptions by "Dr. Greenthumb," to Evidence's "I don't smoke weed more, but I don't smoke less;" almost the whole freaking album is as much a love letter to weed and dissing lesser rappers as Dre's "Chronic" was. Which I ordinarily wouldn't mind, except the crew fronts early in the album like they ain't all about that. That's like saying, "I hate homos," but you whack off sticking your thumb in your ass.
Plus, Evidence loses almost all street cred by saying, "I don't respect rappers/ I respect Kevin Federline," and I don't give a good goddamn how ironic he's trying or trying not to be; that's just stupid.
The Dilated Peoples album equation:
"20|20" > "Neighborhood Watch" > "The Platform" » "Expansion Team"
At least there's the prospect of a new Babu "Duck Season" comp this year.
This one gets a 2 count.
Monday, February 27, 2006
Cinematic Bad Ass Super 8
Dolemite (Rudy Ray Moore) - "Dolemite"
Django (Franco Nero) - "Django"
"Tiger" Tong Po (Michael Qissi) - "Kickboxer"
Frank Booth (Dennis Hopper) - "Blue Velvet"
Indio (Gian Maria Volante) - "For A Few Dollars More"
Fung Sheng (Kam Kong) - "Master Of The Flying Guillotine"
Itto Ogami (Tomisaburo Wakayama) - "Lone Wolf And Cub"
Rev. Harry Powell (Robert Mitchum) - "Night Of The Hunter"
Holy lawd, entertaining myself is damn expensive
You know that part in "Being Malkovich," when John Malkovich himself does into the hole in the wall, and all he sees is people in a restaurant that look like him, and all they can say is "Malkovich?" That's my life, 24-7-365.
My master plan to get another part of this ongoing story bailed out, thanks in no small part to my massive amount of undone paperwork. Which, I'd like to point out, I'm not going to bitch about too much, since I'm convinced that the majority of blogging that goes on in the interweb is either goth in nature, or people wallowing in self-pity more abundant than the reserves of gasoline that the government is hiding from us, in an effort to bring its citizens financially to their knees.
Right now, though, I need to get my own financial situation in order. Part of that involves picking up my tax return sometime this week. Part of it also involves balancing my spending a little bit more effectively. And of course, one thing that will help me gain more money is ... ugh, going back on the on-call schedule. Which is just dandy. Did I mention I'm hoping to hear from another job, maybe this week? Well, here's hoping; and nothing more will be said of it for the rest of this week, other than an update, if I should hear something.
Oh, and a new look hits Southernfried Wednesday. Can't let myself forget that. Since it's a poor man's advertisement for SGM and all. Some people can bitch about stupid local wrestling, but can't be bothered with responding to a few emails with their busy schedules.
Saturday, February 25, 2006
TNA: Impact 2/25/06
Monty Brown d. some guy. No contest; "Alpha Male" owns, even though Don West doesn't know the difference between a "T-bone suplex" and a fallaway slam.
Post-match, Brown calls out Christian, who obliges. Then, perhaps the greatest interaction this side of 3rd grade:
CC: "What's the capital of Thailand?"
MB: "Why don't you indulge me with your geographic knowledge?"
CC: "Bangkok."
Then Christian smacks Monty Brown in the balls! Christian > any of us.
AMW cuts a promo about the upcoming AMW/Jarrett/Abyss vs. 3D/Rhino/Killings match at Destination X. Then, Alyx Shelley busts in with his awesomeness ... the quicker I see him in a match or tag team with Christian, the happier I'll still be.
AJ Styles vs. Roderick Strong - No chance Strong wins here ... not against Samoa Joe's enemy #1T (tied with Christopher Daniels, of course). Those three will be having an Ultimate X match at D-X; how the hell will Joe get his flabby ass across those cables? "What's a nigga gonna do when he's Samoan?"
Strong really is the messiah of the backbreaker ... that half-nelson drop over the knee is incredible, and even moreso when he did it to Samoa Joe several weeks ago. I hear Strong and Aries are being disciplined for some slight against TNA at the last PPV; if that means that I'll have some time to get "Austin Aries - Gayboy" out of my memory. And look at that ... Styles Clash, it's all done wit'.
"What's going on in the back?" Buncha whores, that what. Gail Kim needs to be doing butt-naked split-leg moonsaults on my dick, as of yesterday. Kim wants Jackie Gayda to wear something that apparently makes Gayda disgusted ... like it could be any sluttier than what she's wearing already?!
James Gang (nee New Age Outlaws) vs. Team Canada, represented by Bobby Roode & A-1's bacne. Billy Gunn seriously needs to stop with the ponytail business, seeing as how he's almost 50. I don't know what's gayer: the ponytails, or the shirt tied in a knot in the front. TNA, book LAX vs. Team Canada now. But get a better rep than Ma-sheh-tay.
Speaking of, post-match we have a run-in by the LAX. And Konnan fears, FEARS I say, Bullet Bob Armstrong. Double-you tee eff?
Let's see, TNA makes a "global impact" but they still don't run consistent house shows? Why not a one shot deal at the old Asylum in TN?
That fat-faced "Mithter, would you play with uth?" little girl in the "Hills Have Eyes remake" commercial is really creeping me out. Not that she's scary, but it's scary how much I want her to go down on me. AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love this promo for the Joe/Daniels/Styles Ult-X match ... everyone says stuff like "Joe can't compete in the Ultimate X match like a normal X-division competitor" ... oh just say, he's fat & that fat fucker might snap the cables, 'cause he's fat.
Oh, shit, he heard me, and now he's out to choke me like a bitch. Joe vs. Shark Boy ... you gotta be fucking kidding me. "Joe's gonna eat you!" The crowd is crazy. Will Joe sell the bite to the ass? Will he?? All signs point to ... oh jesus, Joe with a pele kick to Shit Boy on the top rope!! Like I said, you gotta be fucking kidding me.
Gail Kim has some big titties. Gayda still complaining about wearing something over her slut uniform.
The Snickers toupee commercial is solid gold. Dude would've gotten away with that look if he was using Reese's Cups ... then the chick would be so hot for him, she'd eat his asshole.
Ron Killings in an "in-depth" promo, talking about his upbringing. Shelton Benjamin & Ron Killings ... book it!! Rhino & Ron Killings vs. AMW for the Tag Titles - Killings is from Flair Country~! Shame that the "Black Nature Boy" nickname is taken by Scoot Andrews. Killings & Storm lock up to start, and in a series of moves, Killings is wearing Storm's cowboy hat while kicking his ass. Now Rhino & Chris Harris trade some offense. Killings seems to have Storm's number so far; Rhino neutralizes Harris pretty effectively, too. Abyss interferes with some heelish dickery ... BLACK HOLE SLAM THROUGH A WALL!! KILLINGS HAS NO PARTNER!! NOW I KNOW HOW THIS IS GOING TO END!!!111onehundredeleven Death Sentence ends this abortion of a title match.
Abyss cuts a promo. "Bwargh! Bwargh! Bwargh? Bwargh!!"
We end this shindig on a video viewing party with Jarrett, Canadians and ... Gayda in a pirate barmaid's outfit. It seems that they videotaped Sting at home? Shelley complains about Sting being unlisted in the phone book ... I wonder if he looked it up under "Sting?" Shelley's ongoing commentary is the best thing going today. This would be rock solid if Shelley caught Sting having an affair. And Eric Young ... he plays paranoid almost as good as the clients that I see trying to malinger for disability ('cause they're too lazy to work ... it's easier to be called mentally ill than to get a fucking job).
This week's verdict: March 12, I am seriously considering getting Destination X, for realla.
(And on a side note, yes, "Marvel Zombies" is every bit as weird as you think it would be.)
Today is Friday ... All-Day! (on 5 min tape delay)
It's always Fantasy-Book Friday.
Today's match is ...
(NWA, 1985)
-vs-
Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff
(WWF, 1985)
This week's psych terminology is:
Learned Helplessness - When I worked in the prison system, I found myself in sessions for conflict resolution 90+% of the time. I would introduce alternative problem solving methods for inmates to use to resolve problems between each other or with staff; inevitably an inmate would say something to the effect of, "When you back a dog into a corner, there's only one thing he'll do and that's attack."
"Except," I would respond, "when he just hunkers down in the corner and takes it."
A study by Seligman proves this. In a study that was onstensibly about extinction and spontaneous recovery in behavioral learning, Seligman put a dog in a cage with a metal floor and taught it to escape through a gate. Then, Seligman administered a mild, uncomfortable shock to the floor, and the dog escaped immediately. After enough trials, Seligman no long opened the gate, which in turn forced the dog to absorb this uncomfortable shock. After enough trials, the dog took to cowering in the corner. Finally, Seligman reopened the gate following the shock; however, the dog would not jump out of the cage. Instead, the dog would return to cowering in response.
It's not that the dog forgot how to escape. On the contrary, upon removal of the negative stimulus, the dog exited the cage just fine. It had just learned that when an uncomfortable stimulus was presented, there was no escape, so the next best thing was to just sit and take it. Think about that, next time you're presented with some obnoxious situation or person, and you have no other recourse but to take it on the chin for the home team, just for one small moment of sanity. Sometimes it's better, the devil you know; at least you learn how to deal with it.
This never really sat well with the inmates. I can probably figure out why.
Incidentally, my other favorite response from the inmates was, "Pressure bust pipes." "Except," I would respond, "pressure also makes diamonds." But that's a whole other issue. (Info from Forty Studies That Changed Psychology, 2nd ed.; Hock, R.)
Today is Appreciation Day!
Today, I appreciate the sound of birds in winter. Growing up in Tennessee, I would watch the birds migrate for climates further south. When I relocated my base of operations to South Carolina, it was odd to hear birds singing in the cold. This week, I was greeted everyday by the singing of birds, despite the cold and despite the gloomy weather. It was a reminder that spring will come, man, spring will come.
Today, to hope that springs eternal, I salute you!
Your hip-hop MP3 of the week is:
MOP: Cold As Ice
Album: "Warriorz"
By downloading this track, you are agreeing to the following: that you are downloading this for personal use only, and are in agreement that use of this file constitutes no agreement made between representatives of Science Gone Mad and the user; that you are in no way affiliated nor plan to be affiliated with any form of law enforcement which may, through any means, be responsible for the prosecution of illegal file sharing; and, that if you find this track compelling, that you will seek out further means by which to support the artist who recorded it. If you represent or are in fact this artist, you may contact me by the email above, and, provided you can supply approriate documentation supporting your claims, I will remove this file immediately.
This file will remain active for download and perusal for seven days, whereupon the the file will be removed and the link replaced with a redirection to a commercial site where this artist's album may be purchased.
The Forgotten Hero/Villain of the Day is:
Crimson Plague (hero)
First appearance: Crimson Plague #1
Image Comics: Gorilla imprint
Real Name: DiNA Simmons
Superpower: DiNA Simmons is a genetically altered young woman whose blood is toxic and corrosive to the touch; it acts as a form of acid when exposed to the flesh of others. Extremely lethal, even a small amount can kill someone in seconds. To make matters worse, when she reaches her menstrual cycle, that toxicity becomes an airborne virus capable of destroying an entire planet in the course of a day.
Okay ... a character whose whole major storyline resides in her chooch. Okay, so the build-up to her menstrual cycle starting would comprise exactly what, one month of a storyline? What are you going to do for the rest of the series, if her menstrual blood kills the whole planet? Me, I'd write in a side story where her used tampon can be used as a hand grenade. This bad boy lasted maybe 2 issues, which is further proof that you can't fool some discerning comic fans.
Until next Friday, I remain ...
Friday, February 24, 2006
The Joys of Living in Gainesville
NP: Office Chatter
Before I start a rant, I have to say that things are going reasonably well. The last dissertation chapter is in to the boss, the insurance thing is proceeding nicely. Now, let's talk about what isn't going ok.
Gainesville like to build new roads. They also like to fix old ones. We are currently in month 4 of a 6 month road construction project on my street and an adjacent one. Both are four lanes with medians, so they are not little jobs. The road construction is done by a private company (thanks Jeb!), so they are moving actually pretty fast. Lanes are closed but usually for about 2 days at a time and then they move on to another part of the project.
So yesterday, they have the center lanes closed around one median (about 50 yards) while they redid the curbs on it. THis is about 2 blocks north of my apartment, so I pull out of my apartment, crest a hill and then get into merging traffic. I get stopped about even with the very first traffic cone marking the closure, so most cars have already merged.
So I'm sitting there behind a Lincoln Town Car (complete with wheelchair/scooter mounted on a rack on the back). A Mazda 6 pulls in behind me and stops. Then, as a glance in the side-door mirror, I see a blue Hyundai coming up at about 60 mph. I think to myself "that guy is going to try to pass us." You can see where this is going.
Kid decides he is going to merge into the lane like he should....but he failed to apply adequate pressure to the brakes. He creams the Mazda, which pushes the Mazda into me, which pushes me into the wheelchair rack of the Lincoln. I'm ok so I'm out in 3 seconds with the cell phone. The car behind me was filled with 4 International students and one of them had a baby. So I dial 911 and start talking to the dispatcher.
About that time, the little punk kid gets out of his Hyundai and walks over to the sidewalk and collapses. He collapses on his butt though and is just staring at us. I yell at him to see if he is ok, he doesn't answer but he looks ok. So I stay on with the dispatcher until the cop gets there. I look over at the kid and, as soon as the cop pulls up, the kid starts crying.
I wanted to go beat the snot out of him right there.
So the cop comes up and takes our info. The fire truck comes and puts speedy-dry on the anti-freeze leaking from the front of a Hyundai that is now 2/3 of its original length. I call my girlfriend to tell her that I won't be there to pick her up on time. I then call mom and dad just to tell them what happened. Once she finds out I am ok, she says "Don't say anything to the kid."
She knows me too well, huh?
So as I am talking to her, the kid walks up to the old guy who is standing outside his Lincoln and says "Were you stopped? I don't remember anything for three seconds before I hit you?"
I yell into the phone to Mom "The kid is already trying to start an insanity defense."
The kid never spoke to me again.
So the cop gets us to pull our cars into the parking lot of this seedy motel, but only after the road construction company took about 4 rolls of shots of all the damage to our cars. All the immigrant workers and the strung-out junkies come out and look at us. After about 45 minutes, the cop comes and gives us the bad news.
The kid who was driving like he was Dale Earnhardt's ghost a) was not from Gainesville, b) had arrived the night before on a bus, c) had stayed with a friend, but did not know the friend's address d) was driving said friend's car when he pulled his Richard Petty incident, e) could not find his personal insurance or the insurance of the car. He also got cited for careless driving, but the cop did call a tow truck to impound the vehicle so he couldn't get away.
So my car is now in the shop until March 10 with a crumpled hood and two bad bumpers. It was totally drivable (thankfully it didn't get the engine), but State Farm covers 80% of my rental car, so I'm ok there. Just more aggravating than anything else.
Thursday, February 23, 2006
Paul Wight, a/k/a the Giant, a/k/a Big Show
This guy is a very entertaining wrestler, when it comes right down to it. Now, the question is, when's he get the inevitable DVD career retrospect? His stuff with Brock Lesnar was solid. It'd be good to see him vs. Sting again, and vs. Flair. I'm sure he's seen the better side of matches with Benoit.
It'd be great to see some of his segments too, as the angles that he's been in have been full of his unique personality. Plus, there are times when he really knew how to handle his size and strength. Ex. him swinging a stretchered Rey Misterio into the ringpost; his interruption of a JBL celebration, where he walked out to JBL's throng of supporters and they fled from him like a mob of Japanese citizens in a "Godzilla" film.
And any reason to see Bossman saying, "Hey, Big Show, you're a big nasty bastard, and your momma just said so!" is enough to build at least a 2-DVD set around, I'm certain.
T-shirt stupidness
I was looking for work clothes (because I'm gaining weight like a water balloon stuck to the kitchen faucet). Saw a t-shirt that said, "Pink is the new black."
So, once you go pink, you never go back.
So much drama
I'm one day away from a possible suspension from work, although I have almost all the requested paperwork finished. I can pretty much then say that I'm off the hook for probably another week. I got written up last week for paperwork problems, and I thought "shit, I guess it could be worse."
But then, I was told today that if I don't make my productivity for the month of March, I'm getting written up again.
I despise my job. I didn't get a Master's degree in Administration, I got it in Clinical Psychology. I do therapy, and I do it pretty good. What I don't do good is writing the same information over and over, on two & three different forms, stretched out over the duration of the person's time with the clinic. Which can sometimes be years.
I'm going public with this info for the first time ever: I interviewed Tuesday for a Counselor's job at Lander University's Counseling Department. I didn't tell anyone for a long time, because I didn't want to get turned down for the job and then have to hear all the "that's too bad," "better luck next time," "just wait, you'll get a better job," et cetera, 'cause that shit doesn't make the clinic a better place to work. That just makes me feel more like shit where I work.
The position is an incredible one .... working with college students who have hope to improve and want to succeed, not disability leeches or drug-seeking benzofeens. The staff get involved in projects that encourage the clients they serve, instead of cater to their illnesses and promote stagnation (my DBT program is supposed to be like that, but shit, you try talking discharge planning with my supervisors, they ask me how I can promote my group members to stay in the program, despite their improvement). The paperwork is more relaxed. The hours are kinda wonky, but that's okay because the hours add up and every other Friday you get half a day off.
I think the interview went well. I spoke with the director & she actually worked in the general area that I worked in (state health ... her in A&D, me in mental health). She related to my discussion about the paperwork. She described her work & I almost crapped, 'cause it was pretty much what I do with my DBT group, on a weekly basis. "You might have a caseload of 16 students ... that might sound like a lot" ... I have a clinic caseload of 107 people. There's no 90 day treatment summaries to do for Medicaid, no 72 hour time limit on notes being filed, a lot of projects that you can get involved in to promote student volunteership; and, best of all, as long as it doesn't interfere with the work schedule, I could still be an adjunct professor. No paperwork would follow me home, so I could get my Ph.D if I so desired. I'd be on-call for the college (not the community, and not 24/7 like I am now).
Then I had the main event interview with 6 other people - a student, judicial affairs, student affairs, health affairs, housing, a staff member (who also is actually the mayor of Greenwood). The questions were easy ones, generally asking what kinda game I bring to the table. One interesting question asked of me was, "if you enjoy what you do, why are you interested in coming to Lander?" I talked about the paperwork, which the director was backing me up on, and then I talked about how optimistic I am for that population of clients. All in all, it felt like a good interview.
And that's the job I won't get. You know why? 'Cause I'm too hopeful, and I'm too focused on getting out of my current job, that I just sense disappointment. I could be wrong, and I know this, but the part that makes me ill is that I could be right. I'm holding my breath for this position. It's a solid gold opportunity. And suspense is a killer.
I'll let you guys know how it turns out.
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
The cat's ass and the pitchfork
I love this analogy.
First off, I can't relate well to some cliches. "The straw that broke the camel's back," I can't relate to that. Haven't seen a camel outside of a zoo, and I can't imagine a straw heavy enough to break a camel's spine in two. (I know, too literal, but follow me on this.)
I haven't seen many camels, but I've seen a lot of cartoons. So, when I get a client who comes in and says, "I get angry over stupid stuff," I share this observation:
You've seen that cartoon where the cat has one foot on this chair, and the other foot all the way over on this other chair, and this cat's holding a stove, and a refrigerator, and a kitchen table, and an elephant, and a car, and all this other stuff stacked up to the ceiling? And you see this cat shaking, just ready to fall from the chair; underneath this cat's ass is a pitchfork or a shovel of hot coals.
Then there's usually this mouse on a nearby ladder, getting ready to drop a feather, and this feather is presumably that one-last-thing that will make this cat lose his shit.
That cat's you (the client). All that stuff the cat's holding, that's all that stuff that stresses you out on a daily basis: the kids, the family, the job, the neighbors, the boyfriend, the ex-husband (insert other stressors here). The feather that mouse is about to drop? That's all those "stupidest stuffs" that piss you off. That pitchfork? That's you, pissed off.
Now, it's not a question of stopping the mouse from dropping the feather; the feather isn't the problem. Nope, the problem is you thinking you can hold all that furniture and appliances by yourself, one leg over here, the other leg over there. You either drop the heaviest stuff, you build up your strength to hold up the heaviest stuff easier, you develop a way to keep the feather from making your load uncarryable. Or the other option ... you get accustomed to getting poked iin the ass over and over and over.
You'd be surprised at how this manages to make the most sense to even the most basic of folks. I used it in group today, and they seemed to love it.
(Next chapter around the end of the week.)
Goddamn crazies
With Nate's new post up I was gonna hold off on this another day or two, but it was just enough to get me interested and then he goes all Burke on us. Finish a friggin' story, will ya.
Anyway, this is a quick tale of an awesome call I took Thursday evening. I would have posted it that night, but I had a couple of days offline while we waited on the cable company and then this weekend was a whole lotta lazy so here we are.
Call starts with the usual greeting and the lady jumps right in rattling off the phone number for her attorney with the insistance that I must call him so he can handle the situation. I can call out if I have to, but I don't have to for some shit like this so I use the "inbound dialer" excuse. She rattles off something about her cell phone and five other landlines being tapped by the Palm Beach (Florida) County Sheriff's Department over an incident in which she was falsely arrested. They've also locked the handset and stolen two or three others, not to mention the overages they've run up on her account. Plus, they've broken into her home numerous times using information they received from ADT about her security system. There's also something about a call she made from a payphone on October 30, 1997, but that wasn't fully explained.
Unfortunately, this woman's promising career as a corporate attorney has been railroaded by the collusion of the Palm Beach Sheriff and the FBI (or the FCC, she was somewhat confused on the issue) and she is also afflicted with a particularly nasty case of post-traumatic fibromyalgia. But there is hope, as both Janet Reno and William Jefferson Clinton (that's what she called him, so she must be a close, personal friend) have been informed of these horrible circumstances and are working diligently to rectify the situation, as is the Attorney General of the state of Florida. I considered warning her that if she sees ATF agents surrounding her home to get the fuck outta there, but I decided she probably has enough to worry about as it is.
According to our caller, the Miami Herald and various local network TV affiliates have been appraised of the situation, along with the former President and his Attorney General, so I hope I'm not breaking any major national scandals here at Science Gone Mad. Although between this and Ron's battle with frat boys over health insurance at Gator U, we could bring the entire state of Florida crashing to the ground.
The point of the call was that her phone wasn't working and she wanted to know why. Probably because the bill hadn't been paid in two months, which was clearly the result of nefarious misdeeds on the part of the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Department. I guess if you'll tap someone's phones, steal and lock their handsets, run up overages on their cell phone bill, and repeatedly break into their house, stealing their mail isn't a stretch. She decided to leave the phone disconnected as the easiest way to catch a thief is to leave your bills unpaid.
At this point the call was destined to come to an end, although I could have listened to this woman's tales of woe all night, but not before she left me with this valuable piece of advice: "you mess with a Jew, you are through."
Truer words have never been spoken.
Monday, February 20, 2006
[Fiction] Wataru, pt. 1
Kagemitsu Wataru sat in his four chambered cell, breathing slowly, pacing each inhalation methodically. He allowed his eyes to slowly scan the walls of his prison, with its lack of windows or airways. He knew not how long he had been imprisoned here, but what was time to a man whose life had already spanned millennia?
Wataru’s family line extended their military services to the Shogunate as far back as the eighth dynasty, and one of his great-grandfathers had even served as an officer in the Shogun’s army. Wataru’s more immediate family, however, did not have the luxury of assignment to more lucrative assignments that befit his father’s warrior class. Always with his father, Hamonuke, there were peasant lands that needed defending, even the lands that no other warlord in his right mind would ever want to conquer. But, Hamonuke did what he was told, without question, like any stoic samurai would.
Following years of avid training, days spent watching his father train in the fine art of swordsmanship, Wataru decided that it was time to serve in the Shogun’s army. Late at night, he packed one of his father’s finest swords, enough clothes for a three day journey, and some food from the family stockade, and he set out for Edu. Upon arrival there, tired and disheveled, he pledged his allegiance to Oda Nobunaga and vied for membership in the shogun’s army. All it took was lying about his age, claiming a worldly seventeen years - he was fourteen at the time - and he was made a foot soldier in the warrior caste.
At the battle of Okehazama, he slaughtered thirty-two of the enemy’s forces. He was advanced in the ranks very quickly, based on his ruthlessness in the field. His performance at the battle of Nagashino, too, was impressive, and he personally took a spear in the shoulder protecting Lord Nobunaga. After cleaving the head from the shoulders of his lord’s attackers, Wataru was medically treated and, while he rehabilitated, he was advanced to the role of retainer to the Shogun. In fact, so impressed was Nobunaga with Wataru that he bestowed on Wataru the role of head executioner.
But Wataru, as he worked closer to the shogun, became increasingly uncomfortable at his observations of Nobunaga’s madness. Nobunaga made more and more irrational demands as the path to conquer Japan headed toward Kyoto, the capital of Japan. Following the battle of Anegawa, for example, Nobunaga demanded Wataru assassinate not only the enemies that faced him on the battle field, but Nobunaga also demanded the deaths of his enemies’ wives, children, parents, and all blood relatives. Wataru, bound by his sworn oath to the Shogun, could only abide.
It was the incident at Hannoji that turned Nobunaga’s fortune to ruin. In what was supposed to be a simple invasion, Nobunaga’s forces fought to take Takamatsu Castle. So routine did Nobunaga view this campaign, that he opted to not join his forces on the field, remaining instead at the Hannoji temple in Kyoto. Wataru was among a slight contingent of officers that remained with the shogun during the taking of Takamatsu.
However, while assigned to the field, one of Nobunaga’s generals, Akechi Mitsuhide, conspired with a small regiment of Nobunaga’s forces and the Takamatsu defenders to return to Hannoji. They surrounded Hannoji temple and surrounded Nobunaga, forcing him into submission. Akechi ordered Wataru, the chief executioner, to murder Nobunaga. Sworn to his oath to the shogun, Wataru refused. Akechi advanced to kill Wataru, but Nobunaga, in a bout of defiance, unsheathed his own blade and committed seppuku.
Akechi’s issue with Nobunaga finished, he slaughtered all of Nobunaga’s remaining officers, save for Wataru. He marched Wataru to the burial grounds of Hannoji Temple, forcing Wataru to open a grave. Then, Wataru was mercilessly beaten, as a torrential rain began to fall. Wataru was thrown into the makeshift grave and was buried alive.
Wataru had no idea how long he was buried when he was visited by the demon, who offered him immortality.
Insomniac news (NOT Dave Attell)
Can't sleep. I have this weird sleep thing, where if I nod off for even 5 minutes, I can't sleep for several hours. Well, nodded off during the tail end of the Monty Brown vs. Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash match from Final Resolution 2005 (and really, can you blame me?), and I haven't looked back since.
I'm perusing some news items, coming attractions, upcoming releases of many things, so here's just a running commentary ... story segment to come later today.
- CD release(s) of note this week:
Dilated Peoples - "20/20" (I hope I don't have to explain what a fan I am of Dilated Peoples. The last album, while not their best, was at least commercially viable enough to get this extremely talented group of MCs some recognition to keep them recording quality hip-hop)
Nick Cave/Warren Ellis - "The Proposition Soundtrack" (Emo rock god Cave & comic book/sci-fi writer extraordinaire Ellis, teaming up for a soundtrack of a film/play/something that I can find no info on? At least the samples on Amazon sound intriguing.)
- DVD release(s) of note this week:
"Ultimate Avengers" ... actually, ain't shit coming out on DVD, apparently.
- Recent movie review(s):
"Date Movie" looks like shit ... no surprises there.
"Pink Panther" was #1 for the weekend, despite a 30 min. scene where Steve Martin can't pronounce the word "hamburger."
- Good TV: Check out VH1's "Goes Inside Yo! MTV Raps!" Very enjoyable ... except for the really sad (read: embarrassing) rapper send-off at the end. They talk about Yo! never getting the proper send-off, yet the last episode (with the all MC open-mic passaround) was a lot better than Treach, DMC, KRS-One, and Salt & Pepa freestyling a half-hearted and decade-old farewell. Plus, VH1 can't get enough of raping Flavor Flav.
- Great sale on ROH: 15-20% off total purchase ... which means that, given that the three recent TNA DVDs are available on the internet only, you'll get a better deal on "No Surrender," "Slammiversary," and "Hard Justice" on rohwrestling.com than you will on TNA's own website. Sale expires on the 22nd, but they run this sale a lot, so you'll definitely catch it again.
- Did you know there was WWF PPV on last night? I didn't either, but here's the results: He beat all eight of them to retain his title; he won against the rookie; he won with the mystery partner, but apparently it was non-title; he lost because he was still injured; he won the other one's title shot, which gave us yet ANOTHER reference to the dead one; and, he won, retaining the title in what looks like a pretty good match between the two.
- Shit, I missed NBA All-Star Weekend! STUPID FUCKING PAPERWORK~!!!
- All political stuff aside, that whole thing about blaming the victim of Cheney's hunting trip shooting was just completely bullshit. In other news, provocative clothing worn by women causes them to be raped ... more news at 11.
- Google continues to rock the house by its ongoing refusal to submit web-search records to the California US District Court. With all this spying & invasion of privacy shit going on, I'm glad that Google continues to have principles ... until they roll over eventually, of course. Which I hope won't happen. I mean, hell, if I want to look at a random picture of some adult female showing her chooch because she was paid grand sums of money for it, I should be able to. I, for one, am confident in the fact that I never, and will never, knowingly hold an online search for an underage itty-bitty titty committee, so I'm quite comfortable in placing my trust in Google.
- Are math and science 'too hard' for U.S. students? In related news, Mike Judge's new film, Idiocracy, is slated for summer 2006.
- Sam Raimi & Bruce Campbell are teaming to prodcuce a remake (ugh) Evil Dead. Here's a crazy idea; bite the bullet, make Evil Dead 4 instead & tie up that future dystopia original ending of Army Of Darkness. Hell, sign that kid that played Xander from "Buffy" to play Ash's great-great-great-great grandson, 'cause if that kid ain't a spitting image for Campbell, I don't know who the fuck is.
- "Super Size Me" is apparently going up for an Oscar this year, despite being made in 2004. And here I thought that the Oscars were this annual thing that honored movies from the year before, not the 1.5 years before.
- Scientists have reversed diabetes in monkeys using pig cells, in the hopes that this will cause some great leap forward in human health sciences. Ah, THAT's what Bush meant when he spoke of the fear of "human-animal hybrids." We'll soon evolve into a species of human-pig monkeys that apparently fear math and science.
- I wonder, if you never saw another drug or drunk-driving public service announcement, would it impact drug abuse or drunk-driving fatalities in the slightest? A related question: Do the "Truth" commercials have any impact on smoking cessation? Another semi-related question: Which is worse, reality TV or infomercials? Ah, speaking of ...
- Best thing on TV at 4am: the Wild Party Girls sorority sleepover commercial ... I swear, I'm just tired enough to order this thing. Hell, I got that "Hip Hop Honeys" DVD I used to keep posting on the board many years ago. Beats the hell out of "Girls Gone Wild," for real.
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Pizza's here, 'bout fuckin' time ...
This is so a placeholder post for tomorrow. Between the paperwork, putting together the bookshelf that will house my bust collection, and catching up on TNA PPVs on DVD (it's Final Resolution 2005 on tap tonight), don't have much to say.
Um ... watched "Exorcism of Emily Rose," which fell apart completely at the end. "Mrs. Rose, when did you first notice your daughter starting to stab her chooch with crucifixes?"
I threw "Ape Escape 3" and "X-Men Legends II" in the Wal-Mart layaway system last night.
New chapter to that story I wrote a few weeks ago coming up tomorrow. It might not look like a part of the same story, but it is, I swear.
Time to eat. I leave you with this ... why does Sonjay Dutt suck so bad?
Saturday, February 18, 2006
CSI vs. Homicide: Life On The Streets
Which of these two shows ranks as the best crime show on TV?
CSI: First aired in 2000
Homicide: First aired in 1993
CSI: Squad led by Gil Grissom
Homicide: Shift led by Lt. Al Giardello
CSI: Warrick Brown, angry black guy
Homicide: Frank Pembleton, angry black guy
CSI: Catherine Willows, ball busting bitch
Homicide: Megan Russert, ball busting bitch
CSI: Autopsies done by Al Robbins
Homicide: Autopsies done by Julianna Cox
CSI: Oddball, Greg Sanders
Homicide: Oddball, John Munch
CSI: Nick Stokes, came in from Dallas PD
Homicide: Mike Kellerman, Arson cop transferred to Homicide
CSI: Crimes have involved a guy dressed up like a blue cat, a casino mogul who dressed in gigantic diapers, and women who drank their own urine
Homicide: Crimes have involved a sniper who played "Hangman," a guy trapped by a subway car, and an internet snuff film
CSI: Famous victim - Holly Gribbs (rookie team member)
Homicide: Famous victim - Adena Watson (kidnap victim)
CSI: Serial killer - the "Blue Paint Killer"
Homicide: Serial killer - the "White Glove" killer
CSI: Focus on the science of murder
Homicide: Focus on police procedure & interrogation
CSI: Grissom had aural surgery to prevent hearing loss
Homicide: Pembleton had a stroke
CSI: Big criminal - Paul Millander
Homicide: Big criminal - Georgia Rae Mahoney
CSI: Internal strife caused by Dale Ecklie
Homicide: Internal strife cause by George Barnfather
Friday, February 17, 2006
Today is Friday ... All-Day!
It's always Fantasy-Book Friday.
Today's match is ...
(WWF, 2004)
-vs-
Christopher Daniels
(TNA, 2005)
This week's psych terminology is:
Koro - "A term of Malaysian origin that refers to an episode of sudden & intense anxiety that the penis ... will recede into the body and possibly cause death." (Info from the Diagnostic And Statisitical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Ed.) Online research yields that the traditional therapy for treating koro is to have the sufferer put his penis in a small wooden box for a few days. Now, I would assume that this would score at least a week off work, with accompanying paid sick leave.
Today is Appreciation Day!
Today, I appreciate film scores. Not "soundtracks," per se, as usually a soundtrack consists of one-note artists and forgotten musicians trying to cash in on their former glory, contributing a song that will hopefully catch the mood of a filmgoer, or at least their good spending sense.
I'm talking about orchestral releases that inspire the mood of a film. John Williams, when he orchestrated "Jaws," knew exactly what effect music had on an audience. Watch that film, and only pay attention to the "du, duh ... du, duh." Not to spoil anything, but notice how that only appears when the shark is present. Then compare that to the sequels, and notice how none of the composers get it right. There are some great film composers out there to discover: Morricone, Herrmann, Elfman. There are great film compositions that you've probably never heard of: I have three or four CDs of recordings of scores from classic horror films that are just really good to listen to while writing, reading, driving, etc. (Bride of Frankenstein, Wolfman, House of Frankenstein, and Psycho).
Today, to the ultimate in cinematic mood manipulation, I salute you!
Your hip-hop MP3 of the week is:
Krondon: Million
Album: "The Collectors Edition Vol. 1"
By downloading this track, you are agreeing to the following: that you are downloading this for personal use only, and are in agreement that use of this file constitutes no agreement made between representatives of Science Gone Mad and the user; that you are in no way affiliated nor plan to be affiliated with any form of law enforcement which may, through any means, be responsible for the prosecution of illegal file sharing; and, that if you find this track compelling, that you will seek out further means by which to support the artist who recorded it. If you represent or are in fact this artist, you may contact me by the email above, and, provided you can supply approriate documentation supporting your claims, I will remove this file immediately.
This file will remain active for download and perusal for seven days, whereupon the the file will be removed and the link replaced with a redirection to a commercial site where this artist's album may be purchased.
The Forgotten Hero/Villain of the Day is:
Motorhead (hero)
First appearance: Motorhead #1
Dark Horse Comics
Real Name: Frank Fletcher
Base of Operations: Steel City (same city as Barb Wire)
Superpower: Can mentally produce fires at a distance. He does not project flames from his body. Instead he may concentrate on a target that is in visual range and cause it to combust into flames. This power can be used with extreme precision. A circle of fire could be created around an opponent, or a small letter in someone's hands could be ignited. He is also telekinetic. (Info gathered using online resources.)
What I remember of this character, Motorhead's powers are sometimes dangerously unstable, and he has voices in his head. It is unknown if this is due to schizophrenia, or if the voices are real. Motorhead often talks with the voices (to the considerable surprise of onlookers), asking them to shut up or complaining about them. He also sometimes follow their strange advice, such as driving aimlessly in the Nevada desert. Many of the voices are paranoid, a fact of which he's quite aware.
I'm presuming that the "motor" in question is some extraterrestrial mechanical device. Unfortunately, this engine wasn't granted to any hero or villain, just a basic loser who had no intentions to get involved in any crime deterrance. Kinda like the laziest comic character that you'd never want to read about.
I can't believe I missed Thursday ... not one post. That sucked.
Until next Friday, I remain ...
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
The SGM Wrestling Match Haiku Review
"American Dragon" Bryan Danielson vs. Jushin "Thunder" Lyger
ROH: Weekend Of Thunder (2004 Nov 5)
Dragon flips off the
Boston crowd, but can't withstand
a Lyger palm strike.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
It's Valentine's Day ... whoo haa.
I haven't practiced Valentine's Day since probably junior/senior year in high school. I think at the time it was that whole "Valentine's Day was invented by greeting card companies" urban legend that I was into at the time. Now I know better, that St. Valentine's Day has been geared toward a holiday of love since the 19th century, but my decision to not recognize the holiday remains the same.
My philosophy has always been that EVERY day should be treated as if it were Valentine's Day, if you're invested in a chick you care about. Now, granted, one of the reasons I've dated a lot in my life is, when Valentine's Day would come around and I'd give nothing except a heartfelt "Happy Valentine's Day" to whatever girl I was dating at the time, about 90+% of the time I'd be looking for a new girlfriend.
I'm glad I'm in a position where I can afford to be that person I am. I don't have to be all, "Here, honey, here's a dozen red roses for this special day, since I need to make up for having been pretty shitty the other 364." Bump that; and bump my female coworkers (i.e. all of them) for not understanding that. One of my colleagues said that my wife deserves that one day a year where I'm extra-special to her. I responded, "She has that ... her birthday." I told my wife this; she laughed.
There are only three holidays that are worth their time: Halloween, April Fool's Day, and all the other holidays that give me a day off from work are tied for third. Valentine's Day didn't make the cut.
Monday, February 13, 2006
Lest anyone underestimate what I am saying....
NP: Ball and Biscuit -- White Stripes
The creative process can also lead people to go far, far afield from the bounds of taste and respectability. For an example, see http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/blackeyedpeas/myhumps.html
Anyone wanna have a Westminster Dog Show chat???!
So, let's look at my work day, shall we?
Written up for late paperwork and threatened with suspension if such infractions remain unchanged? Check.
Started a new group where, in today's first session, the members started biting each others' heads off? Check.
Client bringing me banana bread? Check.
Another client almost burning his house down by leaving biscuits in an unattended toaster oven? Check.
On the plus side .... um .... Christian's the new NWA World champion. My wife got me a copy of "Gun" for PS2. It's Will's BIRTHDAY TODAY!!!!! (So, see, it's not a bad day after all ....)
The Creative Process
NP: Do You Want To -- Franz Ferdinand
(This is another rambling blog post written in an effort to get my mind sharply focused on writing real stuff)
The swimming in peanut butter analogy that I am just so fond of is only partially right. In the beginning, when the scale and scope of the project is up in the air you do seem hopelessly lost. Once the end is near, it starts to all take focus and before your very eyes you end up with a finished product. I am currently 14 pages from the end of Chapter 8. I have a conclusion to write, but I think I am going to revise 1-8 first and then tack on the end when I know fully what my project says.
The creative process is a wonderful thing because it is so complex and free-floating. The initial dissertation proposal was a far piece away from what it has turned out to be. Over these past months, the ideas and the critical points have shifted to radically different places. The names and the dates are there, but the implications have changed drastically. My perceptions on American politics and the ideas of liberalism and conservatism were wrong, wrong, wrong when I started. Now, I think I'm closer to the truth, and the picture I am painting is sharper, clearer, and more life-like.
The best part of this whole mess is the intellectual growth. I know how to take a set of documents (or many sets from many different archives) and cobble together a story that showed what happened and why those events are important. When I started at Gator U, a very wise professor told me "not to fill a niche," meaning don't write a dissertation on a topic just because no one had done it before. The goal was to find something that can alter our perception of events. While I don't know if I'm going to re-write American political history, I am throwing out some ideas that haven't been discussed in toto before. I'm adding another layer to the rise of the New Right and showing exactly why Goldwater and his supporters were so militant in 1964. The ramifications were, of course, Ronald Reagan (Cue Primal Scream from Josh), but the roots of Goldwaterism were more complex than historians have thought.
In sum, as I am set to graduate in August, I have learned what I came here to do. The switch has flipped from "graduate student" to "historian." Once I get a job, we can put "professional" in front of historian, but until then (and until the Office Depot savings runs out), I'm quite content to know that I got what I came here for.
Sunday, February 12, 2006
Lazy ass Sunday
Call last night was nuts.
Imagine a 120 lbs. girl (pretty much), psychotic as crap.
She beat the hell out of a police officer, bloodying his nose, blacking an eye and popping out a few teeth.
After three security officers came in to keep her cooled off, a nurse came in to take her vitals, and, even with a squirt of Geodon in her system, this little girl headbutts the nurse in the face three times and breaks her nose.
So the chick was in five point restraints when I saw her. She was talking to everybody but real people in the room. Then she turns to me and whispers, "If you let me out of here, I'll suck your dick." Hard to decline an offer like that, but I did. She would not be denied, though; "But I'm really good at it!" At that time, I figured it would be in my best interest to skedaddle. She screams at me as I leave, "But they're going to inject me with detergent and kill me!" We all take our chances, kiddo.
Thank god call is over for another week.
Saturday, February 11, 2006
[Wrestling] Rating The Show: TNA Bound For Glory
Here's a match by match analysis of this card. Shown in October 2005 and recently released on DVD, this is purported to be TNA's equivalent to Wrestlemania. The matches listed here are listed not in order of appearance, but rather how good they are in context of the whole show; the best match is first, the worst match is last. Simple as that.
#1 - X Division Title: AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels (30m Ironman Match) (eighth match)
These two met in exactly these circumstances at Against All Odds 2005 and that was a really good match. This too did not disappoint. I can see the logic of having a 30min Ironman match on a three hour pay-per-view; however, my philosophy is that 30min does not an Ironman match make. It's 60min or nothing; maybe that's why they met in two 30min matches, 'cause that makes a "true" Ironman match spread out over the course of six months. Which must mean that Styles won 2 falls to 0. I also liked the emotional ending to the match, with Styles getting all mushy for the crowd's reaction. He gave the "point of mutual respect" to Daniels. Of course, Styles' reappearance in the Gauntlet later in the show kind of tarnished that lasting image.
#2 - Abyss vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Rhino vs. Sabu (Monster's Ball II) (seventh match)
They be plundering, I can almost hear Dusty Rhodes saying in the commentary in my brain. Unlike Monster's Ball I (from Victory Road 2004) where the competitors sold the disorientation of the "24 hours of no light, no food, no water" kayfabe stipulation, everyone came out looking fresh, bathed, and ready to fight. This match was sick, sick, sick. Sick bumps, sick spots, blood flowing like wine ... I have never been more impressed with Jeff Hardy than I was here. The swanton from the entryway to Abyss on the table was jump-out-the-seat impressive, and even his taking the middle rope piledriver from Rhino was pretty admirable.
#3 - Samoa Joe vs. Jushin Lyger (first match)
Oh my good god, this match was a hot opener, from Joe's Samoan dance troupe accompaniment to the streamers from appreciative fans for Lyger. Great chemistry between the two (they actually teamed together in 2004 for ROH's Weekend of Thunder night two main event). The one problem that critics have given this match is its relatively short length; granted, the ending was out of the blue, but overall it was a tight match.
#4 - NWA Tag Team Titles: America's Most Wanted vs. the Naturals (sixth match)
Gail Kim is hot, even though her vajonky goes sideways. Bwa-ha-ha. These two teams have had some very strong matches in the past, including the first ever Six Sides of Steel match that was a classic. This didn't disappoint. I never was really high on the Naturals, two Southern States born & bred fellas from what I understand. They try to execute the Death Sentence on AMW for the win here, but no such luck. Handcuffs get factored in heavily to the ending, and AMW gets the duke.
#5 - 10 Man Gauntlet Match (ninth match)
The Gauntlet is, by nature, a Royal Rumble style battle royal, except the last two competitors will face off against each other in a standard pinfalls/submissions match. In context of battle royals, I'd actually rank this match higher than the 2006 Royal Rumble. I think the secret to making battle royals a step above a bunch of guys just pretending to push a guy over the top, while actually hanging on to them so that they'll be eliminated in the proper order, is to have interesting segments that interrupt the usual proceedings and create reference points. Examples here include Ron Killings mocking Samoa Joe's dancing intro earlier in the show; the Samoa Joe and Abyss standoff; Kip James tries to save Ron Killings from elimination to further the 3LK storyline; the battered competitors from Monster's Ball striding triumphantly to the ring, to cheers from the crowd; Monty Brown accidentally eliminates himself from competition by eliminating Jeff Hardy.
Order of entry: Sabu - Lance Hoyt - Abyss - Jeff Hardy - Monty Brown - Rhino - Kip James - AJ Styles
Order of elimination: Jeff Hardy/Monty Brown (elim. each other) - Hoyt (by Rhino) - Sabu (by Joe & Rhino) - James (by Abyss) - Killings (by Styles, after James saved him twice) - Syles/Joe (by Abyss) - Abyss (by Rhino)
The match created some speculation of what certain matches would be like with several of the competitors:
Samoa Joe vs. Sabu
Rhino vs. Monty Brown
AJ Styles vs. Ron Killings
Jeff Hardy vs. Sabu
Kip James vs. Lance Hoyt (would probably make a good opening match or midcard palate cleanser)
Rhino wins this one by an over-the-top elimination of Abyss, foregoing that pesky stipulation that the last two have a regular match, one fall to a finish.
#6 - NWA World Title: Rhino vs. Jeff Jarrett (tenth match)
This had a Funk vs. Raven at Barely Legal 1996 vibe to it; it followed a strong set-up match, then the fresh champ comes out ready to kill his opponent. Rhino brought up the best of his ECW memories throughout the duration of this show, but this match made him, in my eyes, a more credible champion than he ever was in ECW. It's one thing to be that dominant Goldbergian type, but Rhino at his weakest still displayed that underdog, never lay down spirit that made the likes of Hulk Hogan a superstar. This ushered in the TNA era of Rhino, which ... ahem, lasted approximately two weeks, when Jarrett got his title back.
#7 - Monty Brown vs. Lance Hoyt (third match)
Even though these guys can come off as green as the newly-mowed grass, they gelled surprisingly well. Hoyt and his tramp stamp tatoo takes the offense to Brown early, but Brown and his charisma prove to be too much for Hoyt. The fans love them some Lance Hoyt though. Brown brings some heavy duty offense, and I keep thinking of the FSN-era Impacts where Brown adopted a Taz-circa-1996 style to his offense. Hoyt counters the first pounce attempt with a HUGE boot, which sets up a moonsault for two, and a 6-9 guy nailing a moonsault if one of the reasons I love the wreslting. This was a nice palate cleanser following the Diamonds vs. SiApolark Boy. Pounce ends the business betwixt Brown & Hoyt.
#8 - Matt Bentley vs. Chris Sabin vs. Petey Williams (Ultimate X) (fifth match)
You can say whatever you want about Petey Williams, but the Canadian Destroyer is just great looking, and the tree of woe/stand on the crotch/"Oh Canada" spot is funktastic. Shame Matt Bentley is in this, 'cause wow, does he suck; it's clear that Uncle Shawn got all the talent in that family. Sabin & Williams can bring the great (see "Turning Point 2004" for proof). Sabin's run-up enziguiri/DDT combo is a very nice sequence. Oh shit, Sabin powerbombs Bentley from the cables! He's dead. The Ultimate X matches are usually either really good, or really bad and ... what the fuck?! The Big Red X (the goal of the match) falls off the cables and lands in the ring. That's kinda funny, but it also clearly exposes one of the bugs of this style of match. But at least the wrestlers improvise pretty well to keep the match from being terribly hurt by the botch, and it gives the fans a chance to come up with another little cutesy chant. They're back on and ... holy shit, it falls again, right into the hands of Petey Williams. And Petey's reaction is perfect. But shit, is Matt Bentley pissed, throwing a tantrum after the match. Wow, like uncle, like nephew. Note: TNA threw a rematch of this bout on their prime time Impact special; that match is also included in this DVD.
#9 - 3 Live Kru (Konnan/Killings/James) vs. Team Canada (Young/Roode/A1) (fourth match)
Whew, this match is bowling shoe ugly! Any tandem of Team Canada that includes A1 and leaves out Petey Williams is most unfortunate. Johnny Devine needs to get back in the Canadian fold immediately. The fans are just so damn smart tonight, foregoing the usual "USA" chants for actually singing the National Anthem. A1 has some serious backne and looks like he's a real shithead outside the ring. "[Killings] has lost all motor skills right now" makes Don West > Jerry Lawler in the booth. She-nan-igans w/ Kip James following the Team Canada victory by hockey stick madness sets up everything that led to the split of 3LK and the formation of Konnan's Latin American Xchange.
#10 - Diamonds In The Rough (Young/Diamond/Skipper) vs. Apolo/Siaki/Shark Boy (second match)
Anyone that pays attention to the internet wrestling community knows that for some unknown reason, six-man matches are now being referred to as "trios" matches. Fuck lucha libre, and fuck their hardcore American fans. Shitcan your masked acrobats, and stick to your subpar, in-ring melodrama and half-assed reheated American matches. This match began and ended with a swank Skipper walk-up shining wizard, mid-match. Diamonds win.
So, to view the card as run, with the appropriate rankings ...
- TNA Bound For Glory -
October 2005
Samoa Joe vs. Jushin "Thunder" Lyger (ranked #3)
Diamonds In The Rough (Young/Diamond/Skipper) vs. Apolo/Siaki/Shark Boy (ranked #10)
Monty Brown vs. Lance Hoyt (ranked #7)
3 Live Kru (Konnan/Killings/James) vs. Team Canada (Young/Roode/A1) (ranked #9)
Ultimate X
Matt Bentley vs. Chris Sabin vs. Petey Williams (ranked #8)
NWA Tag Team Title Match
America's Most Wanted(c) vs. the Naturals (ranked #4)
Monster's Ball II
Abyss vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Rhino vs. Sabu (ranked #2)
TNA X-Division Title Match
30m Ironman Match
AJ Styles(c) vs. Christopher Daniels (ranked #1)
10 Man Gauntlet Match For #1 Contender Shot (ranked #5)
Abyss - Monty Brown - Jeff Hardy - Lance Hoyt - Kip James - Ron Killings - Rhino - Sabu - Samoa Joe - AJ Styles
NWA World Title Match
Jeff Jarrett(c) vs. Rhino (ranked #6)
Final analysis:
Strong opener, mediocre middle which built on solid matches toward a pretty good main event.
Friday, February 10, 2006
Today is Friday ... All Day!
It's always Fantasy-Book Friday.
Today's match is ...
(ROH, 2004)
-vs-
Yoshihiro Tajiri
(ECW, 1999)
This week's psych terminology is:
Synesthesia - This is the phenomenon that occurs when the experiences from one sensory modality stimulate one that's totally unrelated. In plain English, when you start hearing colors & smelling touch. Granted, that's just an example of what synesthesia is, but when you hear of individuals trying to lick the blue flowers on wallpaper, now you'll know what they're experiencing. Sometimes experienced by the truly and most persistently psychotic, it also occurs in individuals who are under the influence of hallucinogens (LSD, PCP, the like). (Info from the Diagnostic And Statisitical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Ed.)
Today is Appreciation Day!
Today, I appreciate kaiju (big monster) movies. I got a copy of "Destroy All Monsters," which is a huge monster mash-up involving Godzilla and about 8 more monsters from the Godzilla universe. I got all nostalgic and shit and pulled out "King Kong vs. Godzilla," "Godzilla 2000," "Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla," and "Damaijin." When I was a kid and we got our first VCR, the only movies that were readily available for kids at the Video Place (also called Fud's, after the owner) were Abbott & Costello movies, GI Joe & Transformer cartoons, and Godzilla movies. So, I watched a lot of these during my formative years. Yes, the plots are hokey. Yes, the sets are slipshod. But who cares? I'd rather watch a thousand Godzilla films than one more horrid remake of some film or TV show that Hollywood seems to think that the film market needs a glut of.
Today, to guys wearing big rubber suits stomping cardboard buildings, I salute you!
Your hip-hop MP3 of the week is:
Cunninlynguists: Mic Like A Memory
Album: "Will Rap For Food"
By downloading this track, you are agreeing to the following: that you are downloading this for personal use only, and are in agreement that use of this file constitutes no agreement made between representatives of Science Gone Mad and the user; that you are in no way affiliated nor plan to be affiliated with any form of law enforcement which may, through any means, be responsible for the prosecution of illegal file sharing; and, that if you find this track compelling, that you will seek out further means by which to support the artist who recorded it. If you represent or are in fact this artist, you may contact me by the email above, and, provided you can supply approriate documentation supporting your claims, I will remove this file immediately.
This file will remain active for download and perusal for seven days, whereupon the the file will be removed and the link replaced with a redirection to a commercial site where this artist's album may be purchased.
The Forgotten Hero/Villain of the Day is:
Ferret (hero)
First appearance: Man Of War #2 (Jan 1942)
Malibu Comics
Real Name: Cal Denton
Group Affiliation: The Protectors
Superpower: Superhuman agility & and the feral powers of a ferret (I shit you not); also, the ability to fly (Info gathered using online resources.)
The Ferret was a member of a superhero team called the Protectors, a group comprised of heroes from Centaur Comics, a Golden Age publisher that just couldn't keep up with DC & Marvel during their formative years. Malibu Comics revived a lot of Centaur Comics' properties and published "The Protectors," a 12 issue miniseries based on the exploits of these characters.
From the issues of Protectors that I used to read when I was younger, I recall the Ferret as a cheap Wolverine knockoff. In fact, from the very few images of the Ferret available online, he stands defiantly against some adversary, teeth bared, claws displayed, and yelling some version of "I'm the best I am at what I do!" Now, granted, all I've ever known ferrets to do is run around and poop and chew up the toys you put in their cage to play with, so I can't imagine who would be intimidated by that. Apparently, the investment in Ferret as the breakout character was great, as he not only showed up in the Protectors series, but he had his own solo title as well. Now, get this, one version of the series' first issue was die-cut in the shape of the character's head. Run an ebay search for "ferret comic" and see what I mean ... it's the issue that looks like a giant close-up of the guy's head.
Until next Friday, I remain ...
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Weird shower thought
Michael Winslow, sound effects maker of "Police Academy" fame, could have a renaissance of his career, if he'd only consider beatboxing. If it works for Rahzel, I can't imagine that Winslow would be out of his element.
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
The "N" word
Love the Southern white male.
I was talking to a guy on my caseload today, and during the course of conversation he said "nigger." I reacted with surprise, more from its presence in the context of the discussion than this guy actually saying it (pretty small-town minded kinda guy).
He responds with my favorite justification: "C'mon, you know what I mean. White people can be niggers too. We just call 'em 'whiggers.'"
This made me think: What I remember of my history, "nigger" was the bastardization of the word "Negro." Does that then mean that "whigger" is the bastardization of ... "Whegro?"
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Great day ...
*koff, koff*
Yep, great day indeed.
*hock, ptui*
Amusing commentary postponed on account of sore throat and CSI.
Monday, February 06, 2006
Horror comics
In honor of the DC Showcase House of Mystery volume that's due out tomorrow, I thought I'd run down some good horror comics that have been published, or some comics that will be published in the future:
Tomb Of Dracula (Marvel) - Probably one of the scariest comic books that I read as a kid. I saw Lugosi & Lee in their respective interpretations of Dracula, and none prepared me for the comic version. Marv Wolfman created a vicious bloodsucking psycho that created more than one nightmare for me, and artist-ultimo Gene Colan made the visceral details ooze from every panel. Now collected in a four volume, black & white Marvel Essential series, of which I have the first two volumes. Still as strong as it was when I was hiding under the covers.
House Of Mystery (DC) - DC had a pretty decent collection of horror titles, such as this one, "Ghosts," and "House of Secrets." Only "Mystery" really gained my attention, and I think that was based on the strength of the lead character Cain, the caretaker of the House of Mystery. The premise of the series is that each room told a story, based on the inhabitants that stayed in the house. The house itself was like a major character, as well, since it seemed to exude a personality of its own. Like most of the comics I read in the '70s, part of the appeal of this book was a secondary running storyline called "I, Vampire," which featured a vampire named Bennett who was after a female vampire who led the Cult Of The Blood Red Moon. It was incredible stuff.
Infinite Kung-Fu (independently published) - Kagan McLeod's epic story of martial arts survival in the land of the dead is one hyperkinetic read. It's comic book impressionism at its finest. Production seems stalled at #7, but just recently it's been announced that this book has found a publisher at Fantagraphics, a champion publisher for pristine indy books. So now, the countdown to the Martial World is on.
Walking Dead (Image) - Creator Robert Kirkman calls this series "the zombie film that doesn't end." Taking a page from Romero, Kirkman floods his zombie-infested earth with as many flesh-eaters as he can, but then long stretches of exposition between characters occurs, which makes the readers actually give a crap about these lone survivors in a world beyond anyone's reasoning. I have the first trade, and definitely plan on getting more, as major plotlines need to be tied up. And just like life, some folks make it out alive, and some folks don't, and usually not who you expect.
 | Can't forget Kirkman's "Marvel Zombies" either. (Image from "Marvel Zombies #3.") |
Boneyard (NBM Publishing) - A story about a guy who inherits a cemetery, only to find it's a money pit. Not too mention the fact that it's overrun by swamp things, werewolves, vampires, and demons from hell. But they're not half as bad as the townsfolk who want them out. It's a horror book played for humor, and while I usually don't care for "funny books," this one's got pretty good soul. Not silly, mature enough to entertain, yet lighthearted enough not to hate on it. Plus, Richard Moore can draw big titties.
Flinch (DC: Vertigo) - DC tried the horror anthology again with this book, but being under the Vertigo title turned it into a veritable "oh shit, oh fuck" dialogue crapfest, which was a shame, because when it was on (Jim Lee's contribution about a guy who builds a rocketpack) it was solid. Then there was the story about an ersatz Viagra turning old men into insane psychorapists. That's what we call a "nadir."
Tales From The Crypt (EC Comics) - William Gaines, founder of Mad Magazine, started here first. Not only was "Tales From the Crypt" good, but so were its companion books, the "Vault of Horror" and the "Haunt of Fear." But "Tales" was the grandaddy of them all. And the Cryptkeeper was what every Cain, Zacherly, Boris Karloff in "Black Sabbath" all tried to be. Of course, the forces of hell didn't lose out to good, they lost out to Frederick Wertham & the Comics Code Authority, in what I consider to be one of psychology's worst contributions to our culture. The Comics Code Authority, some argue, was especially set up to target EC Comics, and they went under almost immediately following Wertham's witchhunt. But of course, leave it to William Gaines to rock the house; when a member of Congress asked Gaines about the type of judgment that went into designing a cover image of a woman being dragged by her hair by a madman with an axe, Gaines said something to the effect that he judiciously stopped short of drawing blood and tissue and gore dripping down from the neck; as the image stood, you couldn't tell if she was truly dead ... as if having a live woman being dragged around by an axe-wielding maniac was a more untainted image.
Jason Vs. Jason X (Avatar) - A two-issue mini being put out by Avatar in February. Avatar is one of those indy publishers, so "February" might mean "summer 2006 for all we know." I don't know the logistics of how you get two Jasons to meet each other, but somehow it happens. Much like the whole "Friday the 13th" canon, the more you think about it, the less sense it makes, and therefore it's less fun. So, ride the wave & don't ask too many questions.
Army Of Darkness Vs. Re-Animator (Dynamite Entertainment) - Now, I'm all in favor of monster mash-ups as the next guy ("King Kong vs. Godzilla," "Freddy vs. Jason," "Frankenstein Meets Wolfman," the aforementioned Jason series, et cetera), but this one is just a lot more lame than it ever should have been. It's one of those comic meetings that probably would work much better as an actual movie, because Bruce Campbell as Ash just doesn't "read" well, and I'm sure that the creative team's idea of Jeffery Combs as Herbert West is far beyond how Jeffery Combs actually plays Herbert West.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
Super Bowl XL: Everything but the game
I don't know what's a more disturbing waste of money, the Burger King condiments chorus line commercial, or "16 Blocks, starring Bruce Willis & Mos Def."
The "magic fridge" Bud Lite commercial was pretty funny.
108 balls?! How the hell does he walk? So, they get a new ball every play ... so they're expecting only 108 plays during the game? What do they base that stat on?
Good god, the Rolling fucking Stones for the Halftime show? Didn't they already do the halftime show once before?
FedEx serves up a shitty offering ... where's the PETA stroking "No animals were harmed ..." disclaimer, because I'm just waiting for a virtual-animals' rights group to start up some day.
I'd actually buy a Diet Pepsi album before I'd ever lay hands on a Puff Daddy album.
How much is it costing per second for commercial time during the Bowl? 'Cause I've just seen the third *different* Bud Lite commercial during the 1st. And why is it that beer commercials manage to get better writers than the WWF? (Just wondering.)
There it is ... at 10 after 7, the first mention of Janet Jackson's tittie, in the "Dancing With the Stars" commercial ("Wardrobe malfunction? You wish!"). I'm surprised it took that long.
I gotta tell you, this game is kicktastic and punterrific.
So far the score is: Pepsi < Bud Lite.
I have no interest in seeing "Cars" by Pixar ... looks like the most unnecessary animated film since "Antz" followed "Bug's Life."
You know, I'm going to take this time to say adios to the Super Bowl. The game's boring, the officiating is shit, and the commercials are atrocious. And Mission:Impossible #3 looks like the best damn film that'll ever hit theaters in 2006. And that's completely disappointing.
Sorry for bringing the gripe. I'll try to be more pleasant next post.
Saturday, February 04, 2006
TNA thoughts
Bobby Roode & Eric Young vs. Austin Aries & Roderick Strong needs to happen immediately.
What is the best???
What is the best........................
ECW DVD
Television Show DVD
TV show you are watching
Sport
Food
Restaurant
TV station
CD
DVD
I'm Back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know. Big deal, right? Well I have missed this blog and decided to come back. I have enjoyed reading the latest posts. I will say that Nate you have a wild imagination. I mean you think about some deep shit when you shower. All I think about when I shower is how long I will continue to have hot water. Also, yes we had fun watching the Rumble even though it really was not that good a PPV. I mean how in the hell can Boogeyman beat JBL (who held the title almost a year) with a pump handle slam? Also, I read about Vince's escapades with fondling of a young girl or some shit. Was he on Dateline last night?? It focused on sexual predators. Oh, it was work you say. Well aren't we the fans lucky. Mark Henry. Well, the concession stands, I mean some fans are glad he is back.
Video games. What games are you playing?? Spongebob? You can admit it. But anyway, let me roll out. Peace. It is Saturday which means Monday is two days away. Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!! More work.
Friday, February 03, 2006
Today is Friday ... All-Day!
It's still Fantasy-Book Friday.
Today's match is ...
(WCW, 1992)
-vs-
Bam Bam Bigelow
(ECW, 1998)
This week's psych terminology is:
Frotteurism - A diagnosed paraphilia involving the touching or, mainly, the rubbing up against a nonconsenting person. This usually occurs in crowded areas, where the person is less likely to avoid arrest by blening in with the crowd. The individual rubs his package against an unsuspecting individual, usually imagining a caring relationship with this individual. This might go without saying, but this is a disorder primarily diagnosed in males. (Info from the Diagnostic And Statisitical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Ed.)
Today is Appreciation Day!
Today, I appreciate being interviewed. I was invited to an interview for a promotion to my former supervisor's position, and I think it went well. Granted, I think that if I don't get the position, it'll be because of my relatively short stay with SCDMH (4+ years) and/or my lack of licensure. But, I got the opportunity to explain my views on how the position should be held, and I hope that will be taken into consideration long after the position is filled, with or without me in it.
Plus, the opening for a student counselor at Lander University closed today, so I hope I get called for an interview there. It'll spark a bit of hope in me that I have marketability outside of my clinic, so that if I don't get promoted, I'll at least be able to dry my tears on the new job. It's nice to be recognized for the skills I represent, and even I don't win the Oscar, hey, at least I get invited to the afterparty.
Today, to all the folks that believe that it's an honor just to be nominated, I salute you!
Your hip-hop MP3 of the week is:
Sir Mix-a-Lot: Game Don't Get Old
Album: "Daddy's Home"
By downloading this track, you are agreeing to the following: that you are downloading this for personal use only, and are in agreement that use of this file constitutes no agreement made between representatives of Science Gone Mad and the user; that you are in no way affiliated nor plan to be affiliated with any form of law enforcement which may, through any means, be responsible for the prosecution of illegal file sharing; and, that if you find this track compelling, that you will seek out further means by which to support the artist who recorded it. If you represent or are in fact this artist, you may contact me by the email above, and, provided you can supply approriate documentation supporting your claims, I will remove this file immediately.
This file will remain active for download and perusal for seven days, whereupon the the file will be removed and the link replaced with a redirection to a commercial site where this artist's album may be purchased.
The Forgotten Hero/Villain of the Day is:
Nitro (villain)
First appearance: Captain Marvel #34
Marvel Comics
Real Name: Robert Hunter
Superpower: Nitro possesses the ability to explode and reconstitute himself at will ... Nitro can explode with a maximum force approximately equal to 250 lbs of TNT. The act of exploding leaves Nitro in the form of a scattered gaseous cloud ... [he] can then reassemble his constituent molecules back into their original human configuration at a location of his choosing. (Info from The Official Marvel Handbook of the Marvel Universe.)
Now, what I recall of this guy, outside of his godawful pink and purple costume, was that he was older than any villian had a right to be; I mean, hell, at least they put Dr. Doom over as being maybe in his 50s, but Nitro was qualifying for free coffee at McDonalds. He was a retired electrical engineer, for God's sake. Surely his pension would have been enough to keep him from robbing banks or whatever it is that supervillains did back in his day.
Plus, he had a lame weakness, which was his molecular volatility itself; when in post-explode mode, all you have to do is somehow separate and contain his particles to keep him from reforming. And the fact that no hero brought him to justice in this manner every time he struck proves that Marvel superheroes are fucking idiots.
Until next Friday, I remain ...
Thursday, February 02, 2006
The quest for "Get Out Of My Life Woman"
There's a great piano riff that starts the track "Outta My Way Baby" by Pete Nice & Daddy Rich, and I caught a piece of it on Rob Swift's re-released album, "Soulful Fruit." That's how I found out that the riff belonged to a song called "Get Out Of My Life Woman."
Now, I'm trying to track down that classic riff. It's not from Solomon Burke, or Lee Dorsey, or Freddy King. The versions that are commercially available aren't piano notes, they're synthesizer. Definitely not what I'm looking for.
I'm playing a version by Mel Brown, off the comp album "Neck Bones & Caviar." You'd think with an album title like that, it'd be on there. Nope.
Okay, now we can rule out Albert King. And it sure as hell ain't Mountain ... how ungodly does a blues song sound when it's reheated by a white band with way too much electric? Check out Mountain's "Get Out Of My Life Woman." Chuck Jackson's version is about to make me slip into a coma. And W.C. Clark's version is too guitar driven.
Heh. There's a version by Iron Butterfly.
Then suddenly, BAM! I'm playing all the angles, listening to almost anything when ... "Plunk, plink, piddily-plink, plunk, plink ... get out my life woman .... you'd don't love me anymore." Thad Jones, motherfucker. Joe Williams, Thad Jones, and the Mel Lewis Orchestra.
And, I also did a check on the song, to double check that track and make sure it's the one I'm looking for, and I find a list of other hip hop jams that have borrowed from this track:
Big Daddy Kane’s "Very Special"
Biz Markie’s "Funk is Back"
Double XX Posse’s "Ruffneck"
Doug E Fresh’s "Bounce"
Funkdoobiest’s "I'm Shittin' on 'Em"
Jill Scott’s "Brotha"
Kool G Rap’s "Ill Street Blues"
Main Source’s "How My Man Went Down in the Game"
Pete Nice’s "Outta My Way Baby"
Queen Latifah’s "Latifah's Had it up 2 Here"
Shabazz the Disciple’s "Party with a Tec"
Skoolbeats’s "Outta My Way"
UMC’s "Woman Be Out"
Of course, the track that started it all, Nice's "Outta My Way Baby," I have on CD. Big Daddy Kane's track ... it's Kane, there ain't shit you can say bad about the smoothest rapper to ever spit on wax. I sampled G Rap's track, and it's probably one of the dopest old school tracks I've heard in a minute. I also checked and noticed that I had that Jill Scott track on her ... ahem, album, YEAH I GOT IT! So what, I lose my street cred because of it?! Oh, and we can't forget the wonderfully titled Funkdoobiest's "I'm Shittin' On 'Em" ... that shit's the shit, the hellafied shit that, in a perfect world, would be poppin' in the streets right now.
And that's how, in one night, I became an expert on everything having to do with the song, "Get Out Of My Life Woman."
I gotta tell ya'll, OCD is a terrible, terrible thing.
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
HSIOW
(Holy shit, it's only Wednesday.)
Could the week go by any slower? It sucks having an off-day on Monday, because then Wednesdays feel like Tuesdays.
When I start my new group in my DBT program, I'll be doing 5 days worth of DBT services. Tuesday - group 1; Wednesday - no DBT; Thursday - individuals for grp 2; Friday - individuals for group 2; Monday - group 2; Tuesday - individuals for grp 1; Wednesday - individuals for group 1; no DBT until the following Tuesday ... lather, rinse, repeat.
Now, the reason we are doing it this way is because the second group was supposed to be on Thursday, but my co-facilitator already had a group later in the day, and "just couldn't see doing two groups in one day." But it's okay for me to do 5 days worth of program material? I took it to my supervisor, who said, "Nope, she can't do two groups in one day." And that was that.
Now, also consider this: DBT warrants that the participants have telephonic access to their therapist after-hours. I have 8 people per group ... 16 people will have access to me via a DMH-provided cell phone that remains on from 5p-8:30a (weekdays) and 24 hrs (weekends).
DBT, to give you a little background, stands for Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. It's a very solid therapeutic approach to dealing with individuals diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. The characteristics of a Borderline diagnosis are usually that the individuals have pervasive mood swings, which are often accompanied by alternates between idealization and devaluation (otherwise known as the "I love you/I hate you" dichotomy ... that's what I call it); they often have serious abandonment issues, and will often engage in frantic attempts to avoid real or perceived abandonment (incl. sabotaging their own relationships, sometimes by testing the limits of those that they perceive to care about them); and ... my particular favorite, and the one that keeps my ulcers well fed ... they can also be quite self-damaging (e.g. overdosing, self-mutilating by cutting or burning), and often express parasuicidal ideation ("I'll kill myself if you don't see me for a session a day early" is one of my favorites) which lands them in frequent hospitalizations.
Comparing my group to the other groups in the clinic is like straight-up apples vs. oranges territory. Hell, no, 'cause at least those are fruit. It's like comparing apples to bicycles. Two of my folks have clocked more inpatient stays than my two colleagues' groups combined (22 clients). These are the people who will be expected to exert the insight sufficient enough to contact me BEFORE a crisis hits. (And yes, I've been called as late as 3am more than once.)
And why do I do this? For more money? (If that's it, I ain't seen it yet.) For experience toward my Ph.D? (My current paperwork expectations keep me from even fathoming the concept of doing more paperwork after I leave the clinic.) For professional pride? (You forget, I'm looking for another job at the local state university.) Personal pride, surely? (You know, there is a certain untouchable feeling that comes with dealing with the most difficult clients in the whole clinic, but that only lasts until after the next disruption.)
Had to vent. I'm basically treading blog water until Friday, which will start a new run of some cool shit on here, I hope. Did anyone peep the new look to "that other site?" I did that shit.
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